Deck the Halls...errr decks I guess

Merry Christmas!!

I hope that all of you have a Merry Christmas and enjoy the holiday with your family and friends. Drew and I board a ferry tomorrow morning and will be spending the holiday on the sea, slowly making our way toward the bottom. We will land in Puerto Natales late on Christmas day and then will continue south via boat and bus. We are almost there. We should be on Tierra Del Fuego by New Years. From there we will try to make it out to Cape Horn, the farthest extend of South America, but the Cape is just a small group of islands that are difficult to reach.


Have a great holiday!!

Bugs on the Run

There is one great freedom that most travelers never experience - the cut and run. When you travel on a schedule you tend to stick to that itinerary. When you travel with only a vague idea of what´s coming next you occasionally get the chance to see how fast you can throw all of your junk into a bag and get out of town. Drew and I had yet another chance to bolt in Santiago. This time it was the bug´s fault.

After returning from Easter Island we caught a cab to the hotel where we had a reservation. Upon our arrival the hotel informed us that there was no room at the inn, so we got the equivalent of a night in the stable - the International Hostel. It was late, we were tired, and Drew was sick so we took it. There were no angels, no star, and no wise men at this stable. Just bugs. Bed bugs to be exact. (On a side note, I have now been bitten by just about every type of insect on this continent.)

The next morning we discovered that the bugs had been feasting upon us, and we complained to the management and to the owner. They told us that bed bugs don´t exist. Apparently, they are a figment of my imagination. Choice words were said. Questions about the hotel manager´s intelligence were raised. There might have even been some insinuations about his mother, a dog, and a bevy of circus clowns, but I don´t want to point any fingers.

So we left, stormed out is more appropriate, and hopped a bus south to Puerto Montt. This unfortunately meant we spend the night on the bus, but it was preferable to being eaten in your own bed. The next day we arrived in Puerto Montt and did what any sane person with bed bugs does. We checked into the nicest four star hotel in town. If you are going to suffer, do it in luxury.

For anyone who has not experienced the joy of bed bugs, its a real pain. The itching is annoying, but the little devils are a lot of work! All of our clothes needed to be washed. Everything we owned - backpacks, books, shoes, etc. - all need to be cleaned. So there is nothing like a Friday night in a luxury hotel, sitting on the edge of a bathtub scrubbing out a grimy backpack.

Welcome to my life. You get used to it after a while.

Hawaii´s Lost Sibling - Easter Island

Easter Island is amazing. It is the most isolated human-inhabited place in the world, but that´s not the best thing. It´s on Eastern Standard Time! The most isolated spot is in the same time zone as the second most isolated spot - Washington, DC. That boggles my little brain.

How do you describe an island like this? Very easily. It has the climate of Hawaii, the cost of New York City, the population of Mayberry, and the infrastructure of a third-world banana republic. Then add the tourists.

Everyone has seen pictures of the Moai (the stone heads), they are even more impressive in person. (I think the roar of the ocean helps a little.) The first time you see a Moai you are in awe. The second time is amazing. The tenth is pretty cool. By the two-hundredth statue your eyes roll back and you realize that if you squint just right it sort of looks like Kermit the Frog. About this time you glance at your watch and realize you have only been on the island for three hours.

Now you really understand why this is the most isolated spot in the world and why the islanders just about whipped themselves out. There is nothing here but statues and souvenir shops.

Well that´s okay, when you get tired of statues you can always just hit the beach right? Not really. The island is a series of three extinct volcanoes. Hawaii is a series of extinct and not-so-extinct volcanoes. What is the difference? God smiled on Hawaii and gave it loads of sandy beaches. He did not smile on Easter Island. There is one beach, period. Everything else is black volcanic rock. Fun to scramble around on, but bad to swim next to. The beach is slightly larger than the corner Starbucks. Then add the tourists, many of whom should not be in bathing suits. It sort of makes you appreciate Captain Ahab´s hatred of the white whale. Yes, madam, that bikini does make you look fat. No, sir, I am not insulting Germany, just your wife.

So what did we do for four days? One day climbing a volcano to see the freshwater lake the formed in its crater. One day driving around the island looking at hundreds of Moai. Then Drew and I split up. Drew decided to get sick and stay in bed. I took the jeep that we rented and hit some of the off-road trails to the more in-accessible parts of the island.

It was during this little jaunt that I had a close encounter with nature. Specifically, a pair of blood-thirsty birds. I had parked the jeep at a small pasture that had seven Moai all lined up looking out at the sea. I decided to leave the jeep and hike for a little bit, so off I went. As I walked down the trail I could hear two birds screaming at each other. They were a type of falcon or hawk, but something I didn´t immediately recognize. I have a specific name for them, but I won´t repeat that here.

So the birds were sitting in this tree making all sorts of noise. It is spring-time down here, so I though maybe this was some mating thing. I figured this was some avian ladies man making a move. You know, two birds, some Barry White, a little courvoisier... Who knows where things will go? Nope, they had already done that and now were guarding their nest. I figured this out as I looked up to see two feathery missiles coming at me with their talons out. So I ate dirt. The stupid birds buzzed me and then came around for a second attack. By this time I´d jumped up and started sprinting down the path. I can hear these birds scream and then feel the air as they whoosh by me. Each time they pass me by, they make a tight circle and do it again. I ran down the path, leaped over a stone wall, and ran through the pasture with the seven moai. By this time a few tour groups had arrived and there are about twenty people standing around. The tour guides didn´t even pause as I ran through right through tours followed by two angry raptors.

I survived, but only because the car was unlocked. Stupid birds.

We spent our last day in town shopping for knick-knacks and then caught our flight back to Santiago. I highly recommend making it out to Easter Island if you get the chance. Just don´t stay too long and bring plenty of sunscreen and books.